Use the Delete key: Delete all sexually connected e-mail and website addresses.

Remove your promotional materials: Delete any self-descriptions or self-photos

Stop the cameras! Remove any live video equipment from the computer

Block it! Use blocking services (see the attached list)

Go public: Place the computer in a public area, with the screen facing the door

Seek company: Make a deal with yourself to only go online when someone else is in the room

Imagine five years from now undiscovered: Sit down where you can be quiet and contemplate. Imagine what your life will be like five years from now if you continue to act out on the internet. Consider how this addiction will continue to expand and cost you.

Five years from now recovered: At a later time, sit down and imagine what you life will be like five years from now if you get sober from the Internet.

Counseling: Seek out a professional who is experienced in addressing sexual compulsive issues. S/he can play an important role in providing insight, practical strategies, encouragement and accountability.

A sponsor: Break out of the aloneness of your problems with the web. Connect with an accountability partner or 12-Step sponsor. A sponsor in a 12 step group is similar to a mentor relationship. The sponsor should be someone who is further in sobriety, the same gender, can be called regularly, promotes step work, and encourages you towards set goals.

Your partner: Consider help from your spouse / partner. In most cases, your partner will not be a sexual compulsive and may have trouble understanding your struggles with the internet, fantasy, masturbation, or pornography. Consider getting an experienced counselor to help "direct traffic" for the two of you. Your partner is not your sponsor. You may want to agree on some questions s/he can ask you (and you will answer honestly). Plan a weekly or biweekly meeting to discuss your progress.

Stepping out: Consider attending a 12-Step meeting (see the attached list)

Avoid H.A.A.L.T: H.A.A.L.T. stands for Hungry, Angry, Anxious, Lonely and Tired

Accountability for time: Acting out on the Internet takes time. So make your time accountable to someone. This would exclude your spouse, but may be your sponsor, someone else in a 12 Step program, Promise Keepers, or a friend who knows about your situation and who will go over your schedule with you. This will help you avoid that "Oh, I'm alone and nobody knows" feeling which is very familiar to sexual compulsives.

Antidepressants: Selective serotonergic reuptake inhibitors" (SSRIs) like Prozac, Zoloft and Paxil, are proving useful in addressing clinical depression and compulsive & impulsive disorders. The neurochemical, Serotonin, is implicated in much of what matters to us - from winning friends & wielding power, to managing anxiety & depression, to controlling sexual impulses & aggression. It also pacifies neurons in the limbic system - the brain's "Department of Animal Instincts." It puts the brakes on primitive behaviors like sex, aggression, behavioral compulsions and excessive feeding.

The Three-second Rule: The three-second rule is simple but effective. Often sexually oriented "pop-ups" or unintended sexual content is accessed while a person is doing legitimate work on the Internet. When this occurs, count to 3, and get out of the site, take a break, etc.

The Cost Card: On the backside of a business card-size paper write at the top the word "COST" and list out some of your most significant past and future losses. Write yourself some notes that only you would understand and place this in your billfold. When you start to feel the compulsion try to talk you into acting-out, pull out your card and talk back. Having the facts puts truth on your side and you can escape from relapse. (Doug Weiss, 101 Freedom Exercises: Guide for Sex Addiction Recovery, modified)

The Reward Card: On the other side of the "Cost Card" write some of the rewards you see for your family, health, spiritual life, and career if you maintain a successful recovery from cybersex. Be as specific as possible in your rewards (staying married, seeing your children grow up, better sex). (Doug Weiss, 101 Freedom Exercises: Guide for Sex Addiction Recovery, modified)

The Calling Card: Write out the phone numbers of at least 5 to 10 people who can support your sobriety. When feeling tempted with the Internet, you pull out your phone card and call someone. Keep phone numbers in your wallet, house & office so you can call someone anytime.

Letter to Self: Imagine you were your own sponsor writing a letter to yourself just at the time you want to act out. What would you say? By writing the letter and carrying it with you, you have a significant resource to pull out at the last minute. Simply writing it creates the psychological distance you need. Have sponsors and group members write notes on the letter itself. (Carnes, 2002)

First Aid Kit: Make yourself a psychological emergency first-aid kit. Place in a small box things that provide your life with meaning. Keep this kit beside your computer. If you feel you are about to relapse or already have slipped, pull out the kit to get support for what you need to do. (Carnes, 2002)Suggestions include:

Affirm yourself for the gains you have made

Get accountable to someone

Take care of yourself

Learn from your mistakes

Rest and reflect

Connect to those who know your story

Allow youself to feel the pain, fear, and anger

Stay in the present

Accept that sex is not the enemy

Re-establish boundaries with self and others